Welcome to my weekly freakout.
I haven't heard about insurance coverage yet. Which of course gives me more time to contemplate the whole thing. Surgery - ohmygodohmygodohmygod. What if I don't recover well, what if I can't eat, what if it doesn't work? Slowly my depression is coming under control but I am still freaking out about everything. I have been reading more and more and all the warnings and worst case scenarios are just FREAKING. ME. OUT. I am trying to focus on all the good, and my constant mantra is if I could have done it on my own I would have done it by now. I am reading one of the books I mentioned before, Exodus From Obesity... which is kindof helping except that she had had the actual invasive gastric bypass - so not quite the same. However - she suggests to write a "Dear Me" letter, to write out all the reasons why I am doing this, all the things I want for myself, etc. I will post it once I write it, it will be an emotional step.
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